yes. we’ve gone and done it. daniel and i went and got matching tattoos.
it wasn’t totally spontaneous; we had talked about it for a few months – but i didn’t expect the shop to say they had walk in time available later the same day i called. that was a little bit of a surprise, but we rolled with it.
we are in quite a season of dying off lately. it started with daniel getting sick just before thanksgiving. it ended up being an issue he’s been dealing with off and on for a few years – this time we found out he had been misdiagnosed by a general practitioner two years ago and in mid December, after tests and biopsies and lots of waiting with nothing improving, we got a new diagnosis of ulcerative colitis. the GI we were referred to has a very legalistic view of pharmaceuticals & surgery fixing everything so its been a constant battle since then to get any helpful answers that don’t require either as an option – which if we can manage, treat & possibly cure this naturally, those other two are NOT an option for us.
we haven’t been able to find a drug whose benefits outweigh the scary or stupid side effects so we’ve both been nose down researching what this disease actually is and what natural based healing looks like. while he’s still on medication for the short term – we’re seeking the help of a naturopath to allow him to get off of them completely. i have a huge issue with a medication’s #1 side effect being the disease you’re trying to treat, and this was the less scary of the 2 we’ve tried so far. no joke – his pain was better but this medicine was creating new symptoms that are completely not livable with. i could go on about this forever – really. i’ll stop before this gets out of hand and my blood pressure gets too high.
things at work started to go downhill right about the same time and the stress of dealing with these at the same time started eating me alive. in january i started seeing a therapist and began the process of being treated for PTSD regarding Ollies traumatic labor & delivery – going through all of the medical stuff with daniel had brought on some horrendous anxiety that i couldn’t control and i needed help with – big time.
the end of january brought on more issues at work and started a three week process of my job being changed and i was given the choice to take the new version or leave the institution. the new position i was offered cut my hours to almost nothing and took everything that i had been doing for the last 3 years and loved, away – so in february i was fired/quit a job that i loved and that i thought i’d be doing for a long time.
tour started on february 8th and while I’m grateful it did because we have some income off of it, daniel now had to deal with symptoms & side effects while traveling and playing shows every night. the tour is still running and will through the end of april with him being in and out. we’re starting to really feel the financial squeeze and are getting more anxious every day about what is next.
and so the season has gone and continues to emerge. things have calmed down but really haven’t started getting better yet.
so this brings us back to the matching tattoos.
daniel and i both got our own version of a semi-colon; signifying that this is not the end. this season has weathered and tested us, but it has brought us closer that we ever have been. its painful and stressful and sucks big time, but its not the end. we’ll get through this one, and there will be more like this ahead…hopefully never this severe, but more will come. and those won’t be the end either. the sentences of our stories aren’t over yet; these tattoos will serve as daily reminders of that